February 2010
36 posts
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“Understand, I’ll slip quietly
Away from the noisy crowd
When I see the...”
– From “First Poems,” Rainer Maria Rilke
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“I find a duck’s opinion of me is very much influenced by whether or not I...”
– Mitch Hedberg
January 2010
152 posts
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“You can always count on a murderer for a fancy prose style.”
– Humbert Humbert, Lolita
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“No one ever plans to sleep out in the gutter; sometimes that’s just the...”
– Bright Eyes
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Bunch Of Phonies Mourn J.D. Salinger →
savingpaper:
CORNISH, NH—In this big dramatic production that didn’t do anyone any good (and was pretty embarrassing, really, if you think about it), thousands upon thousands of phonies across the country mourned the death of author J.D. Salinger, who was 91 years old for crying out loud.
“He had a real impact on the literary world and on millions of readers,” said hot-shot English professor...
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One of my favorite passages
“My brother Allie had this left-handed fielder’s mitt. He was left-handed. The thing that was descriptive about it, though, was that he had poems written all over the fingers and the pocket and everywhere. In green ink. He wrote them on it so that he’d have something to read when he was in the field and nobody was up at bat. He’s dead now. He got leukemia and died when we...
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An open letter to my across-the-street neighbor...
Dear Neighbor,
Yes, I know you’re a doctor—well, OK, almost a doctor. We all know you’re almost a doctor. And I promise, on behalf of all of us on the block, we won’t forget that you’re almost a doctor. So, if you want to just wear ordinary clothes like the rest of us while doing your weekend mowing, watering, weeding, etc., go right ahead. It’s fine. Really. We...
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The Flaming Lips, “Do You Realize??”
...
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“Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, exhibit number one is what the seraphs, the...”
– Humbert Humbert, Lolita
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“-alive;we’re alive,dear:it’s(kiss me now)spring!
now the pretty birds hover so...”
– e.e. cummings
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“I am beyond belief in the help I require just to exist at all.”
– Elliott Smith
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To capture the true spirit of the party, GOP...
(via savingpaper)
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Jemaine: Women love weaving. They love to weave. Bret: No, weaving is a man’s game. Jemaine: Bret, you put a woman in front of a weaving machine and just watch her go.
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“I saw this commercial on late night TV, it was for this thing you attach to a...”
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McSweeney's
NIETZSCHE’S ANGEL FOOD CAKE.
BY REBECCA COFFEY
- - - -
1. Allow the angel to reach room temperature. Then kill it.
2. Kill God. Set Him aside.
3. Preheat the oven to 375 degrees.
4. Ecstatically whip, as if possessed by a storm-wind of freedom, 1-1/2 cups of excellent egg whites with 1/4 tsp. salt and 1-1/2 tsp. cream of tartar. Continue until peaks are as if raised to their own heights and...
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“Boys who spent their weekends making banana nut muffins did not, as a rule,...”
– David Sedaris (Dress Your Family in Corduroy and Denim) (via bouncytrouncyfun) (via dailysedaris)
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“You can dip your brain in joy when you find the real McCoy.”
– Yo La Tengo
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Charlie: Oh shit. Look at that door dude. See that door right there? That door marked ‘Pirate’? You think a pirate lives in there?
Dennis: I see a door marked ‘Private.’ Is that the door you’re talking about?
Charlie: No, I was talking about . . I didn’t say . . what’d you hear?
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“When I was reading [Twilight], I didn’t know how to read it from a teenage...”
– R-Pattz, demonstrating complete disdain for his own movie
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“My dad’s a women’s rights activist.”
“Your dad? Not...”
– Flight of the Conchords
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“Yeah, well, she’s got two jobs. She’s a pastry chef and a sniper.”
– Bret, Flight of the Conchords
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You were right about the stars:
each one is a...
“ Never trust anyone that doesn’t smoke pot or listen to Bob Dylan…Never trust...”
– Ben Kingsley, The Wackness (via quote-book)
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“I remember when I was a teenager thinking my girlfriend was cheating on me, and...”
– R-Pattz, random self-loathing comment.
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“It’s just that she remembers how she came running
Each evening, when she...”
– Excerpt from “Bitch”, Carolyn Kizer
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